Dear younger first time home buyers,
You've found your dream home. It's a 4 bedroom 2.5 bath on a quiet street with huge trees and street lamps. You never imagined that you would be SO grown up that you would be buying a house for your family. But this house...this house is calling your name and you MUST see the inside. The landscape is perfect, the driveway is perfect, the front door is so cute you have to post a photo of it on instigram immediately! As you park your car in front of the double attached garage and enter you are feeling overwhelmed. Your heart beats faster and you look at your partner who now has a smile on their face.
As you enter the home you notice the beautiful tile work in the front entryway and notice how it must have been done by hand. It's solid perfection. As your eyes glance up you notice something else. Something unsettling. Something that makes your heart sink into your stomach. As you look up into the front hallway and see the beautiful winding staircase leading up hard wood steps and a perfect banister you feel almost disgusted with what you now see. Floral wallpaper.
Now, let's all take a deep breath before we faint or scream that "this is going to cost thousands to fix". No, it's not. You are just an idiot and you don't understand how houses work. Let me walk you through this as easy as I can. A bottle of Dawn soap is $1.79 at target. A box of 30 hefty garbage bags are $5.60 at Target. A cleaning brush with stiff bristles is $1.29 at Target. A mop bucket is $3.99 at Target. While you are there, you may also want to grab a few new CD's or a small portable IPhone speaker. This will save your marriage so don't forget this part!!! If this is the first home improvement project you are doing with your partner, make sure you guys don't talk a lot. (Trust me!)
You take your bucket and put some hot water and Dawn soap in it. You take the brush and you brush the soap on the walls. Now that hot water is rolling down your arms, I hope you think back to when you were screaming that "this will cost thousands". Now you understand why your Realtor looked at you like you are an idiot. I hope you laugh and I hope you find the perfect paint color for that hallway.